I trade in dreams, both dry and wet.

2010-03-02T19:28:00.001-08:00

It finally happened.

2009-07-21T21:29:00.000-07:00

Well, I finally hit 100 comics.

It's been a crazy time of drawing, cussing, being stressed out and drawing some more.

I told everyone that when I hit 100, I would get a "real" website, and that I did.

narcolepsyincorporated.blogspot.com will no longer be the home of Narcolepsy Inc.

For future webcomics, please refer to my new site..

www.narcolepsyinc.com

Everyone has been so, so supportive. Have a wonderful time reading as I continue to make comics. If you're even one fifth as excited as I am, you're hiding your erection right now.

of weblogs and lies

2009-07-20T05:26:00.000-07:00

I wasn't playing with my wand!

2009-07-17T05:25:00.001-07:00

Pranks and parenthood, a winning combination

2009-07-15T05:25:00.000-07:00

2009-07-13T21:03:00.001-07:00

HOLY SHIT! Having a website is tough and is making me more organized than I ever, ever wanted to be.

We come in peace young man.. PEACE!

2009-07-13T05:26:00.001-07:00

what seemed like a great idea..

2009-07-10T05:28:00.000-07:00

Branching out

2009-07-08T05:27:00.001-07:00

something doesn't taste right about this forecast..

2009-07-06T05:26:00.001-07:00

More than meets the eye

2009-07-03T05:19:00.001-07:00

From what I hear, it's not even worth seeing for free. How sad.

You're a long way from your box, boy!

2009-07-01T05:25:00.001-07:00

But that's not all!

2009-06-29T05:26:00.000-07:00

Wow, what a weekend. They say you only turn 26 once. I'm thinking I might try that again next weekend though, because I don't really remember doing it this weekend. Today's comic is another in a line of dead celebrity jokes and I kind of hope I don't get to do another one for a long time. I mean really.. what the hell is going on. Our random pop culture stars are dropping like flies.

Also, today's comic are thanks to Jim and Adam. Jim gave me a new pentab for my birthday (awesome) and Adam helped me think of the ideas for the punchline. That's why there are two.. couldn't decide which one I thought was funnier.

Sorry Billy.

Wow.. really?

2009-06-26T05:24:00.000-07:00

I have to admit, even I feel a little bad about this one.

That scares me, because my "feel bad" reflex hasn't kicked in for a long time.

Retro gaming marital strife

2009-06-24T05:26:00.000-07:00

Father's Day

2009-06-21T07:42:00.001-07:00

Happy Father's Day to all the fathers out there who read this. I'm assuming there may be at least one?

And on that note...

2009-06-19T05:39:00.001-07:00

It's where I met your grandmother..

2009-06-17T05:26:00.000-07:00

I hope you've played Sims.. but then again, I hope you haven't.

2009-06-15T05:26:00.001-07:00

If today's comic doesn't make sense, sorry? Such is the price of specific humor.

The Surgeon General just called..

2009-06-12T04:20:00.000-07:00

Dear Callie, Shelly and Erin.

Happy Friday.

No more teachers..

2009-06-10T05:24:00.000-07:00

The death of tardies.

2009-06-08T05:24:00.000-07:00

Suddenly, it all makes sense.

2009-06-05T05:25:00.000-07:00

Happy Birthday Justin.

Did anyone notice this is the first black guy on Narcolepsy Inc.? I did. I figured it was time to get some culture around here and what better way to do that than to go with one of the oldest and most flattering stereotypes. God damn lucky black guys.

...in other news, going through some kind of crazy personal stuff, so just a warning, I might not be able to draw my typical three comics this weekend. There may be a slight break from Narcolepsy inc. next week, but if that happens I promise, I will return.. Oh yes, I will return.

Trapped under the bed, 4 of 4

2009-06-03T05:26:00.001-07:00

This cookware is so PC.

2009-06-01T05:25:00.001-07:00

Trapped Under the Bed 3 of 4

2009-05-29T05:27:00.001-07:00

Con-grad-ulations.... HAHAHAHA

2009-05-27T05:24:00.000-07:00

Sexually Frustrated

2009-05-25T07:15:00.000-07:00

Trapped under the bed, part 2

2009-05-22T05:18:00.001-07:00

The beginning of a horrible, horrible journey.

2009-05-20T05:26:00.000-07:00

Move that BUS!

2009-05-18T05:25:00.000-07:00

I'm really sorry about the size. Honestly, I don't know why it's fucked up like that. Is it HUGE on your computer? I think when I'm exporting the cartoons from Flash, something's going on. I'll try to have Wednesday's at a regular size. Maybe my computer knows I've been having eye troubles lately and it's trying to hook me up. Computers are so intuitive sometimes. Like a dog. A dog filled with data. Data and porn.

like craigslist, but less VD.

2009-05-15T05:25:00.001-07:00

Now you're a man.

2009-05-13T05:25:00.001-07:00

Let's see you heal from this...

2009-05-11T05:25:00.001-07:00

From the womb to your eyes

2009-05-08T05:25:00.000-07:00

HAPPY MOTHERS DAY

(later this weekend, I just don't do Sunday updates.)

What have you learned?

2009-05-06T05:27:00.000-07:00

What are those claws? More like LIES!

2009-05-04T05:26:00.001-07:00

So we saw Wolverine this weekend.

I'm still upset.

What's happening?

2009-05-01T05:26:00.000-07:00

Time flies when you're a moron.

2009-04-29T06:27:00.000-07:00

So, just a quick note. The guys over at amazingsuperpowers.com have really shown their true colors yet again. I wrote them an e-mail when I first started NI, and they wrote me back with feecback and cartooning tips. Once I switched off of stick men, I wrote them to let them know and they wrote me back with nothing but encouragement and a few more photoshop tips. It's really cool when someone who is already established takes time out of their day to help someone who is just starting out.

Sweet Irony!

2009-04-27T05:26:00.001-07:00

So I draw a comic about swine flu, go to bed, and wake up sick.

Is this poetic justice?

This is still better than your "man-diaper Sundays" idea.

2009-04-24T05:22:00.000-07:00

Kind of like Babe, only more realistic.

2009-04-22T05:25:00.000-07:00

So hot...

2009-04-20T05:26:00.001-07:00

God I hate that girl

2009-04-17T05:28:00.001-07:00

I think this one is funny to me because I've met this girl before.

and I hate self righteous people. The world's only big enough for one of them and I'm not changing.

New Tom and Alex on Monday.

No girls allowed

2009-04-15T05:26:00.001-07:00

I always feel like...

2009-04-13T05:30:00.001-07:00

And so our story begins...

2009-04-10T05:26:00.000-07:00

Stupid nature

2009-04-08T05:26:00.000-07:00

2009-04-06T11:30:00.001-07:00

Tom, unlike Alex, views college as the start of a wonderful journey. For the first time in his life, people can't tell him what to do anymore and he's ready to embrace that. Tom is obsessed about women, pranks and cartoons. His reference for what college should be like is every college movie ever made. He wants to get arrested. He wants to duct tape people to walls, to hide poo in people's shoes, to flirt with alcohol poisoning. With nothing to lose and everything to prove, Tom is ready to start the decade of his life he will later try to remember.

This is me

2009-04-06T11:26:00.000-07:00

The new comic (new but not every comic will be about these two) is about my old roommate Tom and my adventures through college. We didn't know each other going into college, and we both had very different ideas about what college should be.

Alex is straight laced and studious. If things go right, he will be the first from his family to graduate college and that makes for more than a little pressure. Unsure of what he wants to study, constantly seeking approval and insecure about his height - he just wants to keep his head down for the next four years so that he can start a life.

sick day

2009-04-06T11:23:00.000-07:00

I'm home sick from work today so I thought I'd put up a couple of the characters for the new comic.

Consequently, I highly advise against making frito chili pies with fat free chili. We had that for dinner last night and about an hour later I felt like someone was beating me up from the inside. Turns out the fat free chili and full fat fritos do not in fact cancel one another out. They make poison.

They get away with a lot more than we do.

2009-04-06T08:09:00.000-07:00

The adventures of Tom and Alex; or what is, The Life of Cats

2009-04-05T13:48:00.000-07:00

For the longest time, during my undergraduate experience, I dreamed of making a comic. I drew the characters, I thought about their wacky adventures.. but I never had the follow through.

I've been doing narcolepsy incorporated for a few months now, and I am fucking in love with making comics. I know I'm not professional and the art itself isn't even that decent, but as it turns out, I find myself eagerly anticipating Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays, so I can upload a picture from the folder on my desktop labeled "waiting to be used". I daydream in class, I daydream at work, I... nightdream? comic ideas.

The only thing that's missing is some form of continuity. I want recurring characters. I want anyone who reads my comic to occasionally log on and be like "Oh, so that's what those crazy kids have been up to."

Either way, as it were, I'm going to start throwing in ideas from the comic I never made years ago.

The comic is about myself and my old roommate Tom. We literally had adventures and nearly perfected the notion of well-planned pranks. We stole cars, picked fights with football players and nearly killed a guy one time just to make a music video.

So, in the coming weeks (months and years?) you'll get to see the comic I always wanted to make. Shenanigans will ensue.

I'll introduce the characters soon.

Happy birthday

2009-04-03T07:33:00.001-07:00

April Second

2009-04-02T05:26:00.000-07:00

So a lot of my favorite web comics were doing their own April fools issues yesterday and saying things like they were quitting the comic business, or killing off main characters and I realized that:

1. I don't have main characters

and

2. If I quit, the three people that read this comic would probably move on pretty quick.

So, I made an April second comic and you can just deal with it.

Expect quasi-main characters to come soon.

Ta Daaaaa! The big five Ohhhhhhh...

2009-04-01T05:27:00.000-07:00

Hey hey hey, here it is, the big number fifty. If my comic was a woman, she'd be depressed. If my comic was a man, he'd be getting hit on by younger women with daddy issues.

Seriously though, it's pretty exciting to think that I've drawn 50 comics, some way better than others. I told myself when I hit 100 I'm making a real website, so I guess I'm halfway there. Thanks for everyone who reads this comic and screw you to everyone who doesn't.

I'm assuming that the people who read this will pass that on to those who don't. Even if you don't know them.

Also, I am well aware that today is April Fools day. Expect a wonderful prank related comic in the coming days.

Oh, all these years!

2009-03-30T05:27:00.001-07:00

Cut the freaking cord.

2009-03-27T05:27:00.001-07:00

That guy in between us sure is a stiff...

2009-03-25T05:28:00.000-07:00

Spring Break comes to an end

2009-03-23T05:25:00.000-07:00

I've been reading on Facebook about everyone and their dog going out of town on Spring Break.

Now it's over and you're all back.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Homoerotic

2009-03-20T05:49:00.001-07:00

For some reason, when I lived in the dorms, a lot of the other guys in the hall would constantly try to surprise each other with their dicks. I don't know why, but when I saw the movie Waiting, it all made sense. It's all about acceptance.

Acceptance and a deep hidden desire for bj's from guys.

I'm going to miss you.

2009-03-18T05:00:00.001-07:00

Window of opportunity.

2009-03-16T07:22:00.001-07:00

RESET THIS GAME!

2009-03-13T06:13:00.001-07:00

Clever. use. of. periods.

2009-03-11T08:26:00.000-07:00

OMG

2009-03-09T16:30:00.000-07:00

I hate wasting a post for something that's not a comic, but HOLY FUCKING SHIT!

If, for any reason, you ever, EVER don't know what to get me for my birthday or Christmas...

Shop here.

www.beardhead.com/shop.html

What is this, 3D art?!?

2009-03-08T18:30:00.001-07:00

I don't know why the color's fucked up. Maybe MS Paint isn't the award winning artistic program I've always thought...

Mephesto was a name on South Park. I used it here.

2009-03-06T08:47:00.000-08:00

I hope you guys get this one

2009-03-04T12:54:00.000-08:00

I don't know why, but for some reason, this struck a funny bone in me.

You'll never be an eagle scout.

2009-03-02T09:40:00.001-08:00

Enter at your own risk.

2009-02-27T12:07:00.001-08:00

You didn't take your pills.. did you?

2009-02-24T21:25:00.001-08:00

Old people are so sweet.

2009-02-22T21:12:00.000-08:00

I drew this on MS Paint. Do you know how much it sucks drawing real cartoons on there?!?

That's why the old people look like they have a severe case of ET neck.

Om nom nom nom

2009-02-19T19:56:00.001-08:00

Driving to OKC tomorrow (Friday) so I'm putting this one up Thursday night.

quick comic

2009-02-18T12:32:00.000-08:00

Quick post.. I'm in training all day... Art sucks, but I think the idea's there.

Valentines Day, a little late.

2009-02-16T14:53:00.001-08:00

So we finally got Adobe Photoshop and Illustrator on the home computer, but I have not used them since I was like a junior. It's taking me some time to remember. I feel pretty guilty though to use these amazing programs to make stick figures. It's like using NASA's computers to download porn.. Kind of a waste.

A fun waste.

That guy is so baller.

2009-02-13T06:06:00.001-08:00

It's raining outside

2009-02-11T08:50:00.000-08:00

Today's comic is a thought I've had for a while. I think when people get their black belt in karate, instead of fighting one tough guy, they should have to fight about 30 semi-tough children.

Because life is unpredictable.

Quick, probably not funny

2009-02-09T06:40:00.001-08:00

I have to go to CPR training for work today, so today's comic will be pretty abbreviated.

It's still here though, so fuck off.

Horribly inappropriate

2009-02-06T13:38:00.000-08:00

Today's comic may be misconstrued. Let me set this straight. Abortion is not funny. Marital strife is not funny.

Incompetence is fucking hysterical.

Breaking up is hard to do.

2009-02-04T08:53:00.001-08:00

Sometimes I think the best laid plans only work if people get them. Otherwise, you just look dumb.

When I was a kid...

2009-02-02T11:59:00.001-08:00

This is an idea I've had for quite a while. I'm super busy at work today, so the art is way sub par (which is really bad when you're talking about stick figures done on MS Paint), but I think the concept is funny enough to sell it.

It's Friday, woop woop

2009-01-30T08:54:00.001-08:00

Psych!

2009-01-28T15:01:00.000-08:00

Just remembered I have a new laptop.

I know, who forgets that?

IT'S SNOWING!

2009-01-28T14:37:00.001-08:00

Ok, it's not really snowing, but no update today because I'm off work and have no access to MS Paint.

I have a boss iMac and I can't update my comic because I don't have access to the shittiest paint program ever...

That makes so much sense.

Connect 4

2009-01-26T10:09:00.000-08:00

Grade this, old man!

2009-01-23T07:37:00.001-08:00

Opposite day

2009-01-21T08:48:00.000-08:00

I remember opposite day. I don't remember what day it was, but for some reason, it always fell on the days that people were nice to me.

2009-01-20T06:09:00.000-08:00

Yesterday was a holiday and I had the day off work. I drew this Sunday night, but I kept telling myself I wasn't going to put this one up because I could think of something funnier.

Turns out, when holidays roll around, I lose all initiative and motivation and become this big, videogame playing slob.

No wait... I never had initiative or motivation. What?

Where am I?

Ta-da can get you out of anything.

2009-01-16T06:06:00.001-08:00

I used to tell people that saying "Ta-da!" can get you out of anything, and I think deep down, I still believe it.

You let an awkward fart... "Ta..da?"... You kill your neighbor and the police come to arrest you.. "Ta-DA!"

It really works in any situation.

Whose week is it?

2009-01-14T07:08:00.000-08:00

2009-01-12T06:07:00.000-08:00

Kind of sick today, not much of a post, but the comic made me smile.

Sorry about your pseudo-tragedy

2009-01-09T06:00:00.001-08:00

Another week down, it's Friday night and I'm not on call until next Wednesday. What does that mean?

Well, I don't know what that means.

Aaaanyways, this Monday, Wednesday and Friday updating thing is actually pretty fun. I know the cartoons aren't that hard to draw, but finding time to do anything other than work is tough.

Coping with sadism

2009-01-07T05:59:00.000-08:00

My sense of humor is getting ahead of me. Lately, I've found that I think of jokes at the most inopportune times. I don't think I'm a sadistic person, I just think that my brain deals with awkwardness by finding something to laugh at.

God, I hope that's all it means.

2009-01-05T12:23:00.000-08:00

The weekend came and went, faster than I ever could have imagined, but at the end of it, I had nothing to show for it.

That, was amazing.

Sad, sad realizations

2009-01-03T16:40:00.000-08:00

When I was around 5 years old, my grandma gave me a big box, about the size of a tv.

I decided that I was going to turn that box into my very own Batmobile.

I drew tires on the side, cut holes in the front that I could sit inside and shine flashlights out of for headlights. I think I even drew the bat-symbol on the back.

Then, I had an ingenious idea.

I made a grappling hook for my car. I took a large roll of string, tied one end to a pencil, and attached the spool itself to my car.

I literally had visions of me throwing the pencil at things, then winding the spool as my Batmobile inched closer and closer.

After many attempts, trying to throw the pencil at different things, it would never actually wrap around an object like Indiana Jones' whip, so I jumped out and tied it onto something, jumped back in the Batmobile and started winding. The slack pulled tight, tighter and then the string broke.

My grappling hook fucking sucked. All of those mini-action cartoons in my head of me scaling the side of the house in my homemade crime fighting wagon were demolished with the snapping of that single string.

Fast forward 20 years.

I see a video online of how you can mod a normal laser pointer into the same type of laser pointers people pay thousands of dollars for. The kind that can cut through objects and burn anything. Even people.

The kid in me comes alive. I can see myself chasing the cats, Susanne, carving my name in trees, basically being a modern day supervillain.

I get on Amazon, order a cheap laser pointer and the tools to do the mod.

After nearly an hour cussing at the damn thing trying to break the safety seal, I get it open, use my new micro screwdriver, tweak the screw that is supposed to make it stronger, and then haphazardly put it back together. It looks like a duct tape covered fountain pen, but holy shit, anyone who makes fun of it is getting a laser sized hole straight through their forehead. And then...

The fucking thing doesn't work.

Immediately, I will never be a supervillain.

I will never get to don a cape and hide in the bushes on campus, setting freshmen on fire. I will never get to hide in the trees outside my apartment and pop the mailman's truck tires with my laser. I will never walk into a bank and... well, you get the idea.

There is no worse feeling than realizing weeks of dreaming were just dreams themselves.

A continuation

2009-01-02T21:13:00.001-08:00

It's been brought to my attention by someone (Jesse) that my sloth cartoon isn't as funny to everyone outside my head as it is to me.

I'm going to take one more cartoon to try and express how fucking hilarious a guard sloth could be, after that, the joke will be laid to rest.

Exotic Home Security

2009-01-02T08:55:00.000-08:00

I've often wondered how awesome it would be to have a pet sloth. I mean, it's one of the only pets that if it actually runs away from you... you really didn't try that hard to catch it.

You could piss a sloth off, and three weeks later, catch it in your front yard while it's still trying to run away.

Wii need to go to AA

2008-12-31T06:03:00.001-08:00

It's new years eve, so I suppose it seems fitting to put up a comic centered around drinking.

I've been thinking about putting out some old Alex and Tom comics from back in the day. The ones that were funny, but I had nowhere to put them.

Happy Birthday Jebus

2008-12-30T08:00:00.000-08:00

I got to thinking, if Jesus' birthday is supposed to be Christmas. (Yes, I know there's no way Jesus was born on Dec. 25th) who buys presents for him?

What does he wish for?

Does God stand in line on Black Friday hoping to get a good deal on the things Jesus wants that year?

Did God trample that guy?

It truly is the season of giving.